Wish list

Aug. 16th, 2012 11:34 pm
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I want a t-shirt I can wear to dances that will make people more comfortable asking me to dance, and at the same time less willing to think of me as a potential date. Really. I go to dances to dance. I understand that other people go for other reasons, but I go for the dance.

more dance blather )

Still Life

May. 18th, 2012 09:01 pm
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I have never felt so isolated as I did today while trying to fill out paperwork for a government background check. They ask for three good friends, roommates, co-workers, etc. who can vouch for what you over the last five years, not including relatives. I am happy with my isolation in general, but trying to come up with three "good" friends where I knew both the address and phone number was the hardest part of the 2 or so hours I spent on the paperwork. (And I still ended up using aunts.) 80% of my social interaction is with relatives, and the other 20% about evenly split between internet acquaintances and classmates/coworkers. I don't know anyone's address, even people I talk to and have phone numbers for, and I am not asking for someone's address so that I can provide it to the government for a background check.

Making stupid government forms easier to fill out is a stupid reason to wish I had closer friends, when I never feel that way until I am confronted with something like this.
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I keep seeing things about how most people's brains don't see credit card money as real money, so paying in cash is harder and makes them think about how much they are spending more than when paying with a credit card.

I am very much the opposite. If I have cash, I don't count it as money I actually have. Money in a savings or checking account, on the other hand is real money, in my head. It may just be numbers on a screen, but it is easily trackable numbers on a screen. If I have to see what I spent money on, and see the balance actually decreasing that is much more mentally painful than spending not so easily trackable cash. This is why I have savings that are helping me put myself through school, and why I have been thinking about buying myself a tablet computer for six months plus and have still not broken down and been willing to actually dig in to my savings enough to buy it.

On the other hand, I watched lots of PBS specials on money from the time I was 10 or so, so even when I got my first credit card at 16 I only ever missed a payment and did not pay off the entire balance each month twice in the first year when I lost track of when the bills were due, so I expect that I am not the typical person with credit card debt that the authors of those articles are trying to reach.

Someday

Aug. 22nd, 2010 11:50 pm
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Social interaction is both hard and exhausting. I should really know my own limits, and not try to fit in more than two social occasions that I am uncomfortable in in a day, but I push and then can't stop myself from retreating into absolutely no social interaction until I recover. To the point where I didn't even go outside today, or answer a text or email.

On the other hand, I did manage to see family, some friends I hadn't seen in a while (two weeks to two years, all at once) and go to a ballroom dance. Today's retreat meant not taking my grandmother to get her hair cut or doing the grocery shopping. Oh well, there is later in the week for both, and at least there wasn't an appointment I missed.

Really need to figure out a way to do better about the whole social thing. Really.
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Applying for jobs. . . :| Necessary, but kind of annoying? I haven't done this in about 4 years, so am not really sure I am doing it right? But that is my feeling on a lot of things. Still . . . filled out two applications for jobs (yay?), and found another I might apply for--
but the commute looks ugly. Do I really want a commute that is 40 minutes when there is NO traffic? Perhaps I am spoiled, but my last job the commute only took 20, not probably an hour+ if I am trying to go during rush hour. Can't I just keep being a full-time student for another few years? I've only been back in school full time for 3/4 of a year . . . (The answer is no. There needs to be money coming in as well as going out.)

RL

Mar. 10th, 2010 06:25 pm
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I'm done with two of my four classes for the term! This term is the first time I've been a full time student (and not working full time) in about 4 years. SO much more interesting than my job was, but also SO much more time consuming. Having two classes done feels so much better than still having finals coming up in all four. I still have two big tests in one class and one in the other, but I feel a bit like I can breathe for the first time in weeks. Yay! Back to studying now, but I can see light at the end of the tunnel I don't think is an advancing train, so I had to share.

Finishing tests in nice.

Snow!

Dec. 29th, 2009 08:58 pm
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I got to practice driving on ice and in snow today. The entire city shuts down when it snows because no one else has any practice driving in the snow either, and crazy people leave their cars parked in the middle of the street. My 15 minute commute took almost 45 minutes. My mom called and told me it took her two and a half hours to get home; she says my dad thinks he might end up spending the night at work. And really, the snow? Maybe 4 or 5 inches. Almost everything grinds to a halt for 4 or 5 inches of snow. We are so unprepared.

Still, fun fun. And my last day of work is tomorrow! I get to be a full time student again for the first time in almost four years. I'm looking forward to it tremendously, but expect it will really cut down on my reading time. :P
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Whoever designed the pipes to the KITCHEN sink so exposed was not thinking ahead. Yes, it may only get cold enough that it matters for a few weeks every 2 years or so, but when it does, that is the KITCHEN sink. It is a bit hard to cook, or, you know, clean up after eating when there is no water in the kitchen. >( I even left the cabinets open and the water running a bit all night. Apparently it wasn't enough.

Dilemma

Dec. 5th, 2009 10:05 pm
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Do I spend $120 to apply to the 3 year nursing school at the hospital where I have no idea if I have any chance at all to get in (but would get a BSN directly) as well as $40 to apply to the 2 year program at the community college that would then let me transfer to the hospital to do the third year and get the BSN, and where I know that the acceptance rate is only 8%?

I'm thinking yes. $120 seems like a lot to spend on an application when I don't even know what the acceptance rate is, but ... when I am spending the $40 and I know that the rate is only 8% I guess I just need to trust in my grades and my willingness to loose some money and time and apply again next year? Yes? That stupid 8% is hanging over my head and taunting me. And instead of studying for the Anatomy and Physiology test that could actually make a difference to my prerequisite grades, and therefore my acceptance, I am looking at the application deadlines and freaking out about whether I think I can get into a Fall 2010 nursing program. I had pretty much convinced myself that 8% meant it was unlikely and I should be thinking about 2011, but the new migraine meds seem to be working, I am doing much better with the CFS flair up I was complaining about a month ago, and I am feeling a bit more optimistic. I don't know. /whines.
inshadowsandlight: darking: IN UR INKBLOTZ HAVIN FUNFUNFUN  WITH UR PSYCHE (Default)
[insanejournal.com profile] stele3 posted a few days ago about some guys I have never heard of before being unaware of their privilege in a way that is misguided and disgraceful, but also very common. I see it blatantly each week in my community college writing class, and in some form in many other places as well. It got me thinking.

Read more... )
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I don't get out that much, and of the four concerts I expect to see this year, two will have been with the Oregon Symphony, so I don't have a huge basis for comparison. That being said, Ian Anderson has remarkable energy and stage presence for a guy in his 60s.

The tickets were a birthday present and already paid for months ago, or I wouldn't have gone with the way I have been feeling, but I had a lot of fun. I really do love Jethro Tull.

The symphony did a good job acting as backup, as they always seem to. It was really fun to see the orchestration of some of the more complex songs like "Thick as a Brick" and "Bourée" done live, and there was a flute duet, "Griminelli's lament," that I had never heard before and may need to go buy. I enjoyed to first half better than the second, but can't really decide if it was my personal song preference, the way my head was feeling, or something else. The encore was "Locomotive Breath," which was fun. I've been trying to remember what else was played, but other than "Aqualung," whatever that Christmas song is that brings tidings of comfort and joy, a song called "Change of Horses" with a guest viola player and (I think) "Life's a Long Song," I can't remember. I know I'm forgetting things.

The overall takeaway though, for me, was that Ian Anderson has more energy in his little toe than I do in my entire body, and more stage presence than anyone playing the flute has any right to. Brilliant show, and I had a wonderful time.

Even if the headache that was starting to get better seems to be worse again. /whine
inshadowsandlight: darking: IN UR INKBLOTZ HAVIN FUNFUNFUN  WITH UR PSYCHE (Default)
I am actually noticing minor spelling and punctuation errors in fanfic again since taking this writing class. It is really quite disappointing, as it's throwing me out of the fics. I suppose it is possible that the fics I am reading just have more errors, but find that somewhat unlikely. I don't know whether to work harder to ignore the errors, or just deal with the fact that I need to go back to reading books instead of fic in my spare time (what there is of it) while taking a writing class.

Don't wanna

Oct. 4th, 2009 05:47 pm
inshadowsandlight: darking: IN UR INKBLOTZ HAVIN FUNFUNFUN  WITH UR PSYCHE (Default)
complaints and whining )

Ok. Maybe I can actually be productive now that that is off my back?
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I don't communicate enough. Read more... )
inshadowsandlight: darking: IN UR INKBLOTZ HAVIN FUNFUNFUN  WITH UR PSYCHE (Default)
Just finished reading The Enchantment Emporium and want to turn back to the beginning and start again. (This is a feeling much more usual with fics, which aren't such a big time commitment.) I can't really justify it though, as I have my Anatomy & Physiology final in a week and really should have spent at least six hours today studying instead of reading a novel. No mater how good.

I think, though this might just be heat of the moment, that Enchantment Emporium is probably my second third argh, thinking about this I am remembering how much I like her other books too. Say top five.

The Fire's Stone is probably my favorite though, and it is still my go to book when I am feeling down.

♥Tanya Huff
inshadowsandlight: darking: IN UR INKBLOTZ HAVIN FUNFUNFUN  WITH UR PSYCHE (Default)
I don't know that anyone would actually care about my thoughts on this, but in an effort not to have a creepy blank journal, I am trying to put some entries here.

I enjoy the fandom characterizations of Brendon and especially Spencer (I own my competence kink) much more than Ryan or Jon, so I admit to being predisposed to like whatever panic! is putting out more than what the Jon and Ryan band (as I've been thinking of it) will put out.

That said, I did try to give Change a chance, and while I expect I would not turn off the radio if I came across it in the car it does not really do anything more for me.

The sound of New Perspective, on the other hand, makes me smile just hearing it. I can't say that I like it as well as my favorite of the songs from Panic that was, but I do think it stands up much better than Change to my personal taste.

If anyone does read this, any recommendations for fandoms with particularly competent characters as I am starting to burn out on bandom?
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Studying )
inshadowsandlight: darking: IN UR INKBLOTZ HAVIN FUNFUNFUN  WITH UR PSYCHE (Default)
I have no idea if anyone will even see this, but I have 2 Dreamwidth invite codes if anyone wants one.
inshadowsandlight: darking: IN UR INKBLOTZ HAVIN FUNFUNFUN  WITH UR PSYCHE (Default)
In keeping with my last post, also lyrics, it seems I am starting a trend.
I was thinking about [livejournal.com profile] bandombigbang and fanmixes, even though I was not sure I would have time and didn't sign up.
Then I came across the song "I Never Thought I Could Feel This Way For A Boy" by The Scotland Yard Gospel Choir (by way of KEXP's Song of the Day).
About halfway through, I stared to actually hear what the lyrics were.

When I couldn't find the lyrics with an (admittedly cursory) google search I went back and typed them up, and am sharing them here because they fit very well with a certain type of fic trope (as I'm sure you'll notice).

If you can figure out what the word with question marks is, please comment. Other corrections are also welcome. Here is a link to a live version: The lead singer bounces!


Lyrics )
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